things I didn't wake up expecting to hear today...

I was waiting for the elevator today with Mr. Rush when Flava Flav came downstairs for cross country practice. As he walked out the door, I was witness to the following exchange:
Rush: Flava Flav smells like feet!
FF: You smell like llama sperm!

The kid didn't miss a beat. I really don't know how he comes up with these things. He just walked out the door, and Rush and I completely lost it as we realized what he'd said...


And, of course, the 8th grade boys are always fun to eavesdrop on...
Student 1: You've gotta watch out for Mr. Cody though, he will steal your girl! It doesn't matter if she's 13! It's not even like he's going to chase after her or anything...
Student 2: Yeah! She will just follow him around!

This kid is endless entertainment...

Okay, I need I new name for "Obsessed with Charmed" because I am going to reference him frequently within the next year...since I have him in class again as a junior, and I feel like his 8th grade nickname could be better. Here are two from history class and one from chem lab...

Ms Brett: What did we name after William Pitt?

OwC: GETTYSBURG!

Teacher's Pet: What's Gettysburg?

OwC: If the Indians won the French and Indian War, would we be called the United States of the Indians?


And during lab, after one student spilled a beaker full of test tubes, breaking most of them:
OwC: Miss Book, how are we supposed to do #2? We don't have any crack pipes!
11th grader: he means test tubes

and so it begins... :)

Mr. John: Flava Flav! Who gave you permission to be in the hallway?
Flava Flav: God.

at soccer practice...
Flava Flav: Do you have any water? I have asthma on my tongue.

Math Award Winner: How many ounces are in this cup?
me: about 12
MAW: Is that more than 8?
Math Teacher: I'm revoking your math award!