more misunderstandings...and other notes

In looking at the stories I have from this past week, I am realizing that most are at least slightly inappropriate. Hah. Enjoy :)

First, chemistry class, where they are testing different types of pop and candy to see if they can replicate the Diet Coke-Mentos effect. This can be a little messy, but with the combined power of some sweet red dish bins that I bought at Wal-Mart for $1.47 each, some towels, sponges and a bucket of water, in the end, all is well. Friday I turned around in time to see Mr. Arrogance standing there holding a 250 mL graduated cylinder almost completely filled with Mountain Dew.
me: Wow. That looks like...
Mr. A: Piss.

Yep, pretty much that's what I was thinking, but I wasn't going to say it. At least, I wasn't going to use that term...

Our tech director was also in and out of the room while the kids were doing these experiments, purportedly fixing the computer (I've been ready to throw the thing out of the window for the past two weeks. The internet will work for about half an hour before the network connection taps out, requiring a re-boot, which takes at least 5 minutes), but also sticking around to watch the experiments. On one of his passes through the room he proclaimed: "My shoes are sticky. That means science is happening!"

Which is what we are all about in room 114.

------
Remember my Favorite Student? Of course you do. I was sadly not present for the following interaction with his current science teacher, but I feel the need to relate it anyway, because it made me laugh. A lot. And reminded me of an incident that occurred in January of this year (check out the archives if you don't remember...).
Anyway, the Earth Science kids are talking about organisms, which led to the following exchange.

FS: Orgasm! Isn't that a disease??
teacher: Nooo...an organism is a living thing.
FS: Oh. Well then what's an orgasm?

This is why you should pay attention in health class.
I think she told him he needed to ask the counselor that question...

-----
I had a student ask me a similarly awkward question this past week, well, actually it wasn't as awkward as I thought because at first I misheard him (for the record: the student sitting next to him ALSO misheard). These are the juniors, most of whom I haven't named for you yet. Let's see...most of the 11th grade boys have gas problems and aren't afraid to discuss them. So let's call him Mr. Gas-Ex, because that's what he needs. The student next to him will be "Master of the 3rd Dimension" (this was his response to the question: "who do you want me to tell if you do something particularly well?")

Note before I begin story: if you are a young, single teacher and you are seen talking to any other young teacher of the opposite sex, students automatically assume you like each other. Just FYI.

So I'm standing in front of Mr. GasEx with a bottle of Diet Coke, talking about how a gas can be dissolved in a liquid. As I paused in my explanation, he looked up and I heard him say:
"Did you and Mr. Otherteacher mate?"

Master of the 3rd Dimension and I both looked at him, stunned, until I finally laughed incredulously and told him that I couldn't believe he'd asked me that and that it was an inappropriate question. I walked down the aisle still shaking my head in disbelief. This of course prompted clamor in the rest of the class,
"What did you say??"

Mr. GE looked confused..."I just asked if they dated..."

OOOOOOOOOOooooooooOOOOOOOOOoohhhhhhhhh.

Then he looked at me, "What did you think I said?"

Then I had to wear the awkward hat AND the awkward glasses as Master 3D explained what we had heard. But it was still pretty hilarious in the end.

Oh boy.

And tomorrow morning marks the beginning of week 3.
Have I mentioned how much I love my job? :)