Faulty binders and hot lockers...

Another day in the 8th grade...

Today they were complaining that their binders were falling apart. I told them that it was because they didn't treat them very kindly. They argued that their binders were melting...I was like...whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!?!?!

They explained that the bottoms of their lockers get really hot...I opened a locker, and sure enough...apparently their is heat under the lockers because the bottom of the locker was pretty warm. I told them that if they ever complained about being cold again I was going to put them in a locker. One of the girls looked horrified...

Flava Flav was the one to start complaining about his binder. After the melting conversation he said (more to himself than anyone in particular), "This binder is like a relationship...it falls apart."

Then, as we were starting class, he told the class, "I'm gorgeous; all genders are tryin' to talk to me!"

Just because you can...doesn't mean you should

I was sitting in the back of the biology class today as they were doing some research for their genetic diseases projects...
Beauty Pageant Girl: Did you know homosexuals are more likely to have hemophilia?!

BPG: Video Game Boy, you'd better stay straight, or you're going to get homophilia!

Oh dear.



Another "oh dear" moment took place during the seniors' chem class today. I lit steel wool on fire with a 9 volt battery, then they wanted to know why the battery lit it on fire. In the course of my explanation, I asked if any of them had ever licked a nine volt battery... Model Student had, but Mr. Arrogant hadn't. She told him to do it.

Mr. A: No! I'm not licking that!
MS: Why not? It's not like it's going to hurt you or anything...
Mr. A: Well it doesn't hurt to lick a horse's penis either, but you wouldn't do that, would you?


aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahha...oh dear...

And Jesus said... or did he?

Sometimes Scripture takes on a whole new meaning when read by a student. Here's what I heard at worship this morning,

"Then his disciples came to him and axed him..."

Whoa! And here I thought Jesus died on a cross...




Flava Flav once again tops the list of interesting things I've heard today (given, it's only 9:40am). Today he was claiming he took showers with his underwear on, and he was encouraging his classmates to do the same because it felt good...

I had to resist the urge to make jokes about being a "nevernude," because I'm reasonably certain that none of them have ever watched Arrested Development.




Another quick note that will give you a glimpse into how things go around here. Due to some pretty important donors coming in yesterday, the head of school interrupted all classes in the middle of third period and announce an impromptu all-school clean-up. Which prompted one of the teachers to change her Google talk status to "My favorite part of the day is 'Hurry up and pretend we're clean! Rich people are coming!'"

A very merry unbirthday...

Today as they were writing their notes, Flava Flav came in from left field (as usual...)
"Who's in charge of my dreams?"
me: Me. Why?
FF: No, for real, because I'm not in charge of them, and God's not because I every night I pray that I'll dream about something and it hasn't happened yet...

Since we were in science class I gave him the scientific explanation that it was just his brain processing the events of the day and choosing which connections to keep and which to throw away. Though I'm pretty sure that's NOT what was happening with Daniel and Nebuchadnezzar...or maybe it was... :-p


And this one's a little older, because my half birthday was February 8th, and that's when it happened. A little background: yes, I do sometimes notice when it's my half birthday because when I was a kid I couldn't celebrate my birthday by bringing treats to school since my birthday was in August...thus I celebrated my half birthday at school since I didn't want to miss out on the opportunity to give my classmates a much deserved sugar high. This year, I remembered and mentioned it to my classes as I was writing the date on the board. The conversation (in BOTH 8th grade and 11th) went something like this.

me: Oh! It's February 8th! Today's my half birthday!
student 1: So your birthday's tomorrow?
me: No....
student 2: OOOOH! It's the 16th!
me: Umm...no...today I am halfway to my next birthday...
students: *looks of confusion*

Apparently it's a foreign concept to them...it required a little bit of explaining...:-p

Overheard...

I was sitting in the back of one of the biology classes today. They are studying genetics...

Bio teacher: No, weave is NOT an inherited trait...




On an unrelated note, I am obsessed with this website:
www.someecards.com
They are terribly inappropriate...and ridiculously funny...:)

Wait...you mean I'm in school!?!?!?

Oh, the 8th grade...
Today I wrote the day's agenda on the board, which basically consisted of finishing measurements for a project they started on Monday, as well as working on their calculations and display cards for this project. When the bell rang, I proceeded to explain the agenda to them, pointing out the paper that I had handed out last week which explained the whole project in detail.

At this point I sat at my desk to let them work while I entered some grades (or checked my email...or whatever I was doing...), after about five minutes Flava Flav goes: "What are we supposed to be doing right now?"

Looking up incredulously I said..."Working on your project..."

Girl Who Wants to Be My Best Friend: "We have a project?!?!"

Me (eyes closed): "Dear, sweet Jesus..."

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I also realized today that I'm picking up some poor language habits. I was waiting in line for lunch and saw School Mascot Kid behind the counter where the bowls were...which is what I wanted instead of a plate. I asked him if there were bowls back there, he said yes, so I said, "Can I get one?" When what I really meant was, "Can you get one for me?" I HATE when the kids say "Can I get that?" when they're really asking you to get something for them...