New Year's Resolution

I know. I say it every time I post. "I'm going to get better about posting!" This time I'm really going to try. I just got lost in some blog posts from my first year of teaching, and, well, they were funny. And I miss being able to go back and remember what has happened at school this past year. Plus, some of this stuff the kids say....really needs to be written down. For posterity. Just sayin'.

I've started posting some one liners on Facebook, but then they get lost in the abyss that is Facebook's record of my life over the past six or seven years (that creeps me out a little bit...and then it makes me remember back in the day when Facebook didn't even have the "update your status" option! What the heck did I use it for back then? Just creeping on people? Weird...)

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. Kids are funny!

In chemistry class, as we're reviewing some vocabulary from the periodic table chapter....

Me: What is a "period"?

Student: It's when your mom gets mad at you for no good reason!

During evening study a week or two ago, one of the 9th grade boys was in the computer lab where I was the proctor...

Boy: Don't worry Miss Book, I'll marry you. (apparently I looked concerned?) How old are you, 27?

me: 28.

Boy: I'm 14. But I'll be legal in four years.

me: I'm 14 years old than you. Technically, I could be your mother.

boy: So when I'm 18, you'll be 32. And then when I'm 30, you'll be...what? 38?

me: No, I'll be 44.

boy: oh.

[silence]

boy: How do you feel about getting bit by a vampire?